Ahhhh, The Philippines
Into the comfortable, airconditioned car I go. Stopping at a refreshment stand for a couple of cokes for me and the driver (I call him Petey, as I can’t pronounce his name). Now I settle back and prepare for the 2 to 3 hour drive (so I read somewhere) on my final leg of the journey I have been anticipating for so long. I take a few sips of my drink and have another smoke, opening the window to allow the second hand smoke to escape so as not to bother Petey was a huge misstake…..more air pollution. I close my eyes and prepare for an hour (or 2) nap. What seems like 10 seconds passes when I feel the car make a sharp turn, opening my eyes in time to see us turning off the highway I check my watch, 45 minutes have passed since I “nodded off”. I feel better now. I assumed I was now in for a few hours of pot hole ridden, dirt road travel and braced my sore ass for the long haul.
About 10 minutes later we passed under a banner reading “Welcome to Barangay Balibago”, or something like that. I knew from my research I was going to Balibago, but had no idea how big it was or how near the hotel we were. Another 10 minutes of side street driving and navigating brought me safely (and surprisingly) to the hotel front entrance. The 2 to 3 hour drive from Manila took only 1 hour and 15 minutes, give or take a few minutes either way. That got Petey a decent tip (about P1000). Later I would learn the value/problems of tipping too much in the Philippines. In my youth I have had jobs in the service industry, and as anyone else who has held those jobs does, we normally tip more than the average.
I want to back up just a bit to the point we were driving on the side streets. That is where I got my first, up close, real look, at beautiful young Filipinas. Freelancers, as I would later come to know them, would saunter (sometimes run) up to the car whenever we slowed down to make a turn or allow a pedestrian to pass by. The first 2 or 3 just waved and seemed to wait for a response from me. All I could do was grin (ear to ear) sheepishly. Just seeing them roused my loins to attention, and when they smiled at me it was all I could do to keep from opening the door and beconning them inside. Between the 4th and 7th ones who wandered over to the car, I decided it would be prudent to exchange cell phone numbers, for a possible carnal interlude at a later time. That turned out to be totally unnecessary.
I have checked in at the front desk, gone to my room, passed out a few P50 tips to the bell boys and room attendants, and settled down on my NOT SO comfortable bed for a little breather and the unimaginable, delightful acceptance that I am finally here, and a weight was lifted from my shoulders (weight being the horrendous experiences of traveling 8,000+ miles). I made myself unpack, and commenced with the 3 S’s again and sat on the bed, air conditioner on full blast, and decided after a few minutes I would change and go for a swim, then get something to eat. Instead, I laid back to rest my eyes while cooling off and then awoke with a start from a most tantalizing dream involving 3 of the “freelancers” I had encountered earlier only to find it was now some 8 hours later. It is now 5am, Philippine time, and my first night here was spent alone. I wanted to cry. Instead, I ordered some room service (outstanding food), watched some TV and generally paced around the room til about noon. I went for a swim, and got a little bit of sun, ate some lunch at the poolside bar, and just generally “chilled” for awhile.
I was drinking my 3rd San Miguel Light, when a bunch of Australians entered the bar and started discussing the prior days football scores. Not wanting to be the odd man out, I introduced my self to some of them and bought a round of drinks. Some 3 hours later, my new friends invited me on my first bar hop. Back to my room to do the 3 S’s again ( I knew I didn’t want to be caught short in a 3rd world bar having to use the CR) and change to some “intelligent” clothing. Shorts, short sleeved shirt and flip flops (in the PI referred to as slippers). A little after shave and some cologne and I was all set. NOTE: DO NOT put on after shave immediately after you shave. Remember Home Alone and what happened to Macully Culkin? Then I got the call from Kevin, one of my new mates, saying they were all meeting at the favorite hangout/restaurant/bar/starting point of most of the foreigners that come to Angeles. It was located on the corner of all the action, and incidently, only 2 blocks from my hotel. Dodging trikes, street vendors trying to sell me Viagra or Cialis or DVD’s or other unnecessary items, “freelancers”, beggars. Motorcycles and cars, I made it there in about 10 minutes.
We stayed there for as long as it took to drink a beer, then made our way across the street to a rather run down looking bland little bar, I was not impressed UNTIL we walked inside. Bigger on the inside and looking as modern as any western upscale bar I have ever seen. The music blasted my ears into submission, and my eyes squinted to narrow little slits trying to pierce the darkness. Then I saw them, up on a stage of sorts, dressed in almost nothing, and doing what I could not in all good conscience call dancing, but trying to move to the music as best they could or wanted to. Pretty young Filipinas, lbfm’s, little maids all in a row. Smiling at me as I entered and saying “Hello Daddy” to the guys I was with, who had obviously made themselves known in this bar before.
We sat down in some very comfortable seats at a table known as the VIP TABLE. Later I would understand what this was for. Immediately a waitress walked up to us and said “Hello Daddy Kevin, how are you nah”, after some chit chat between the 2 she took our drink orders and wandered away, Kevin followed her and whispered something to into her ear and gave her a little pinch on the bottom, she turned and looked directly at me and giggled and said something back to Kevin. He sat back down and I asked why she was laughing at me to which he replied “Don’t be paranoid you bloody bugger, were gonna show you yanks how to have a “good time”, Philippine style.” “It’s sort of an initiation, just relax mate.”.
Shortly, our waitress brought our drinks and with her followed a rather portly, over middle aged woman called Mommy Matilda (or something like that). She was the “mamasan” of this bar. I knew what that was from my endless researching about the nightlife in Angeles City. “Hello Jeffery (not my real name of course because noone needs to know it for the purposes of this story), welcome to my bar”. “Sir Kevin tells me your “cherry boy”, is that true?”. After my mates told me what a “cherry boy” was, I told the mamasan it was true. She said I was lucky cause all the girls like cherry boys. Still not quite knowing what to expect, I savored my beer(s) and started to notice that behind my back, all me mates were pointing there fingers over my head and shouting “CHERRY BOY”.
Soon a new set of dancers climbed up onto the stage and the first set, all 12 of them, made their way to our table. We ordered “lady’s drinks” for all and 3 of them latched onto me. Grabbing my crotch, playing with my nipples, rubbing my head, making an “L” sign under my chin and generally flirting their little hearts out with me, I was truly in a single guys paradise. Within an hours time I learned what a “blow job” was, what a “body shot” was, a “lady’s drink”, a “ring the bell” and last but not least, what a “bar fine” was. So I barfined 3 lovely young beauties, and we commenced with our barhopping. Bar after bar we visited, and each held girls that were more and more beautiful and desirable. It was then I realized that it was not a good idea to bar fine from the first bar you visit. But I was still happy with the 3 I had in tow.
We started out at about 6pm and it was now nearing midnight. I kept my drinking under control, switching to mineral water now and again, so as to keep some sense about me. At the girls insistence (and I didn’t argue), I said goodnight to my mates and we headed back to my hotel. After all the bars we stopped at, at the end of the night, I was still only about 2 blocks from my hotel. There are so many damn bars, its almost unimaginable, and most are right next to each other. In fact at one point on Fields Avenue (the main drag), you can go to 15 or so bars and only walk 1 block.
Back at the hotel, I get a knowing grin from the doorman and the girls at the front desk, “Enjoy your night Jeffery, hehe”. Blushing slightly, we all head to my room. The girls tell me they are a little hot and can we go swimming for a little while. Well of course I smiled and said “Sure, why not.”. This being part of the foreplay I decided. As good as they looked in their work outfits, they were even more gorgeous in their street clothes, and then in their bikini’s they were just wet dreams walking. After some cooling off in the pool, they settled down to some snuggling and underwater frolicking with my manliness until I could stand it no more. “Lets go back to the room now babies”. They all held hands and we made our way to the room, where they all went to the CR together to change clothes and take a shower, I called room service and asked for a few more towels and they were quick to oblige.
When the door opened and they all walked out naked as jaybirds like it was a normal everyday thing for them, I knew what was about to happen. It was my turn to shower, and relieve my bladder and generally freshen up (meaning to make myself semi-hard). I could hear through the door they were watching TV. When I returned to the bedroom, they were all sitting on the edge of the bed watching a show called “WOWOWEE”, as I understand it, it’s a favorite among the Filipinas, old and young alike. Not one of them moved a muscle, except to giggle at each other when someone did someone did something foolish on the show, until the show was over, about 40 minutes later. My “semi hardness” long gone now as I caught myself engulfed in that damn show, even though I didn’t understand a word they were saying. Finally the show was over, the TV went off, the lights went low and the girls cuddled all around me. Just feeling the nakedness of them all gave me back my “semi”, and the fun commenced. First 2 with me and 1 by herself, then one with me and 2 with each other, the switching was non stop and all got a taste of the little monster they aroused. I “rewarded” them 3 times, 1 load for each. And I even got 2 of the girls to explode all over each other. We collapsed into a very deep and pleasant sleep.
In the morning, more like early afternoon, they woke up and 2 of them decided they wanted a second helping while the 3rd showered and got dressed. Eager to please, I gave them 2 more “rewards” and decided to take a taste of their hidden pleasures. They taught me the word “masarap”, meaning delicious, that afternoon. We lunched by the pool, then I gave each a P500 tip plus P50 each for trike fare, and sent them on there merry way with goodbye hugs from all. One turned around and shouted for all to hear, “Daddy Jeffery, your not “cherry boy” nah diba”. She said a mouthful. Ahhhhh, the Philippines.