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Memoirs of a Philippine Mongerer

Things come crashing down in Sabang

As I felt my knuckles crunch I knew I had made good solid contact with Phils jaw but there was a problem the big man was still standing albeit groggily and I decided then and there that the old saying he who fights and runs away lives to fight another day was the most appropriate course of action. Then just as I was about to make a hasty departure a fist came out of nowhere and clocked me right on the left side cheek bone sending me reeling backwards into Phil which caused both of us to fall down in a heap on the hard dance floor of Sabang Disco. I remember hitting the floor having the wind knocked out of me which seemed to hurt even more than my pounded cheek. When you get hit like this I think initially it is the shock that gets to you before the pain but all I knew at that moment was that I was feeling both. Further on down the road I was to find out it was John Cockeran who had hit me because all he had seen was me hitting his mate Phil but at the time I didn’t know that and as I lay there on the floor next to Phil I remember thinking next time I really have to watch out for punches from the side.

Even though big Phil in my book had done me wrong, (at this stage I hadn’t fully grasped the caring is sharing ethos), I did manage to see the irony in my current situation. After king hitting Phil unexpectedly I had received exactly the same treatment I had dished out and now both of us were lying on the ground together. If I hadn’t of been in so much pain I probably would have burst out laughing. As if Phil could read my mind he looked over at me kind of gave me a lopsided grin and said Marty you caught a good one you bastard and with that he slowly raised himself then once in an upright position delivered a solid kick to my stomach which caused me to curl up in pain and as he turned to walk away I heard big Phil some say people just don’t get it no matter how hard you try and explain.

I think I lay on the floor for about 2 minutes and the next thing I knew there was two Filipino guys trying to lift me up and put me on a chair . The Filipino guys got me upright and into a seat and next thing I knew there was an angry Rosie sitting next to me demanding to know why I bok bok her friend Phil. At first I couldn’t believe it as according to me she should have been feeling sorry for me and tending to my wounds but here she was the indignant female acting as if this was all my fault. Listen Rosie I know you have been going with Phil and I am bloody angry and I reckon I have a right to be angry you are supposed to be my girlfriend”. When she heard this Rosie was momentarily nonplused but recovered quickly to say what you mean go with Phil I not do anything Phil, hey girl I replied you can’t play innocent with me I know what you do because Phil told me. With this said Rosie momentarily blushed but once again recovered quickly to say, “I boom boom Phil because I know her long time and she give me money”. So there it was, the bottom fucking line as always, was money.

It took me at least half an hour of sitting there dabbing a small towel laden with ice against my cheek and as I reflected on what had happened I began to feel sorry for myself because I couldn’t shake that nagging doubt that I had done something wrong and come out second best out of the whole affair. I knew Phil had been fucking my girl and I knew I had got a good punch onto his jaw so why then was I feeling like I was the loser and I was in the wrong, and why was Rosie who should be feeling guilty getting all defensive and transferring the blame to me. Later on in the piece I was to question my reactions and ask myself what did getting jealous accomplish apart from a fleeting moment of satisfaction as I felt the punch land on big Phil. Apart from that everything else was all negative and to be honest I felt like a complete loser when looking back on my actions of that day. Yes I had justifiable anger but there would have been much better ways to channel that anger and use it to my advantage but like an immature prick I lashed out and then suffered the consequences.

I sat there for about 20 minutes and then suddenly realized Rosie had disappeared I looked around the club but Rosie was nowhere to be seen. I stood up walked around the disco but again no Rosie so I slowly walked outside looked around and still no sight of Rosie. Exasperated I was preparing myself to walk home when suddenly a vision of loveliness appeared before me holding out her hand and saying her name was Claire. I remember looking at her and thinking this is bizarre. Here I was having just been beaten up, lost my girlfriend all bruised and battered and here was this ravishing girl introducing herself to me with the obvious intent of a sexual encounter. I remember thinking this is something out of the Twilight Zone and I wondered if there was a candid camera somewhere.

I gave Claire a lopsided smile and said “hello sweetheart nice to meet you, would you like to come back to my place and have a drink”? Claire looked at me mischievously and replied ooh, ooh Claire like you Clair come you. Now this night was getting really weird. I had found out my girl was being fucked by new ex friend I had been involved in a fight and come out second best, I had lost my girlfriend to god knows where or whom and here was this hot little Filipina wanting to come home with me and fuck my brains out. Now I have never been one to be backwards in coming forwards and I have always believed every cloud has a silver lining so I just gave Claire my best attempt at a lopsided smile and said that would be great Claire nice to meet you by the way my name is Martin and I will show you where I live. As if having an inspiration Claire looked at me inquiringly and asked “you have girl” to which I replied “yes before I have girl but now we break up so I am free to go home with you”. Claire stood still digesting this info and then seemed to make up her mind it was ok to go with me and proudly announced “ok Claire come you but make sure no girl huh”.

With my aching face and sore ribs it seemed like a long walk back to my compound but with Claire acting as nurse we eventually made it back. When I got there I asked Claire to wait outside just in case Rosie had snuck in but when I opened the door there was no Rosie so I hurriedly ushered Claire inside and shut the door tight. Once the door was closed Claire who had seemed like a nice simple young lady suddenly turned into a little demon and straight away she was ripping at my shirt in a frenzied attempt at getting me undressed. I was still hurting so I told her slow down a bit girl we have plenty of time but she was having none of it and before I knew it I was lying on the bed with her supple lips wrapped around my male organ.

Claire wasn’t an expert at the Blow Job like Rosie but she did have admirable skills and I was in no condition to complain so I just sat back and enjoyed the sensation. It wasn’t long before my dick was rock hard and next thing I knew Claire had slipped off her panties and was riding me like a professional bronco rider. Claire rode me for what must have been about ten minutes when suddenly her first orgasm began to overtake her and all thoughts of Rosie and that nights events flew from my mind as I watched this luscious female gyrate and grind on my dick as the ecstatic orgasmic waves pulsed through her entire body.

When Claire had finished her climax and was spent I thought to myself I don’t care how crap I feel no woman is going to use me like that without me giving some back. Gently I lifted Claire off me all the time grimacing in pain and laid her down on the bed. I entered her slowly at first just gently easing myself in and out of her already wet pussy and like a velvet glove it gripped me not wanting to let go. I kept up this steady pace for about 5 minutes only speeding things up when Claire started to respond. After a while Claire was grabbing my ass and pushing me in deeper all the time crying “hard, hard do hard”. Having a natural inclination to energetic sex I began to pound Claire but rather than asking me to stop Claire responded by digging her nails into my behind and moaning loudly. I thought to myself I really hope Rosie can hear this and the more Claire responded the harder I gave it to her. This must have gone on for a good forty minutes until I felt my orgasm building up and then in one almighty explosion similar to a volcanic eruption I exploded and felt the waves of orgasm course through me.

After this energetic sexual encounter I was completely spent and the pain from my bodily injuries was beginning to kick in so I just lay on the bed thinking about that Bob Dylan song twist of fate and once again I was so thankful for being in this wonderful country. I thought about Australia and New Zealand. I thought how lucky I would be if I was to find a girl as good looking as Rosie or for that matter any Filipina and of course how devastated I would be if a girl like that went with another guy. Opposing this were big Phils words and I couldn’t seem to get the caring is sharing phrase out of my head. Even though this went totally against everything I had been bought up to believe it somehow in a distorted way made sense. Maybe it was because I was in the Philippines or maybe it was because the girls were so easy to get or maybe it was because I was already becoming like a Filipino and operating on a surface level living only for the moment and not giving any thought about the future.

Lying there feeling exhausted and with pain throbbing through my body I tumbled Phils words around in my head and the more I thought about it the more it seemed to make sense. From what I could see Rosie was a bar girl and she was offering herself to him and others for money. I asked myself if things had been reversed and it was me getting approached by Phils girlfriend what would I have done. I answered my question by saying to myself Martin you would have done the right thing and turned the girl down but no matter how much I tried to convince myself there was the nagging doubt. Then there was my hypocritical factor I mean who was I to lecture Rosie when I was fucking around on her as much if not more so than she was fucking around on me. Phils logic that if he didn’t do it somebody else would reminded me of the Dr John song “if I don’t do it somebody else will” and I realized this was not exactly an original line of thought. Yet despite it’s lack of creativity in a weird way it kind of made sense to me. I figured since I wasn’t giving her any money she was going to fuck around and if she was going to fuck around it may as well be with somebody I knew rather than just some complete stranger. Lastly I took a mental step back and analyzed my jealousy saying to myself Martin you are just jealous because you are being possessive and because you are translating Rosie and Phils actions as a slight against you. At the end of the day I still didn’t feel right about things but I was beginning to get a grip on the situation and felt that come tomorrow I may be able to face Phil and with a bit of luck even Rosie.

The thought of Rosie triggered an emotional response in me and I looked at the now sleeping Claire and I wondered just what my feelings for Rosie were. There was no denying the fact that I had some strong feelings for the girl but it wasn’t exactly what I would call love. If it was love her screwing around would have upset me a lot more than it did and I would have only been having sex with her as opposed to screwing any girl I could get my hands around. I realized that I had initially come to the Philippines to unashamedly indulge in hedonistic sexual promiscuity and yet here I was analyzing my depth of feeling for a young Filipina who was equally promiscuous as myself. The feelings of lost love and regret began to kick in and just as I gave Claire a gentle shake to wake her up I heard a loud banging on the door and Rosies angry voice shouting, “Puntang ina Martin open door I know you have girl”.

Memoirs of a Philippine Mongerer

Sharing is caring but not quite yet

Sabang was a deceptive place because time seemed to move so slowly with each day seemingly melding into another then all of a sudden I would sit back and say to myself, wow it’s that date already where the hell did all that time go. I would then make up my mind that I was wasting my life away here with far to many idle hours being spent sitting around with my mates drinking cheap booze, fucking Rosie, eating, playing pool and then maybe for something special on the weekend visiting Sabang disco and trying to discreetly hit on some of the local talent.

Often I would find myself reflecting on this lifestyle and saying to myself come on martin shake yourself out of this, you are going nowhere it’s like you are a beach bum and there isn’t even a decent beach. I would often get to the stage where I would start to pack my bags saying to Rosie “hey girl you ready to go back to Manila I am come on let’s get out of here tomorrow”. Rosie would always smile roll her eyes up and reply “ok hon we go bukas” knowing full well that something would distract me and somehow we would end up staying in Sabang for yet another week.

And the problem was, she was right. No matter how many times I vowed to get out of there something would always come up and I would find myself staying yet another week doing exactly the same things as I had the week before. In fact now I look back on it life in Sabang was just like a continual groundhog day, only being in the Philippines it included getting laid on a regular basis.

Along with the alcohol there was plenty of weed around in those days and just about every second night the boys and I would simply sit by the barbeque drinking local rum or gin and getting stoned off our tits on the local puff. Having grown up in Sydney and attending university in the late seventies early eighties I had indulged in my fair share of pot but there was something special about smoking this shit in Sabang. Not that it was strong or of particularly impressive quality but the environment seemed to lend itself to the experience and I can remember watching many a sunset sitting on my little porch, Tanduay Rum in one hand and a good smoke in the other.

On the weekends we would often head to Sabang Disco which was a chance for me and the boys to check out the local talent and any new talent that might have found her way to Sabang from Manila. Surprisingly enough Rosie who knew exactly why we went to Sabang Disco never seemed to mind and in fact I got the impression she quite enjoyed visiting there with what she considered her group of guys. This particular occasion it was Friday night and about 11PM, all of us had been drinking and smoking fairly heavily before coming to Sabang Disco and then as we mingled just chatting with some locals while scoping out the females big Phil came up to me and said “mate I need to talk with you can you come outside”? By this time I considered Phil more than a casual acquaintance but I could see by the look on his face that whatever it was he had on his mind was fairly serious and he obviously felt the need to tell me right now so I just skulled my rum and coke and replied “sure mate lets go now”.

When we got outside big Phil lead the way to a small sari-sari store where he invited me to sit and ordered 4 rum and cokes. By this stage I was getting a little bit guarded wondering what the heck was so important that Phil had to talk with me about and my feeling of foreboding only got worse when the first words out of his mouth were, “mate I have to tell you a few things about your bird Rosie”. Big Phil was never one for prolonged soliloquies and as such he basically came right out with it. “Mate to be honest me and some of the other blokes have been rooting Rosie’ After hearing this I was suddenly totally straight and as I looked him straight in the eyes I asked mate is this when you knew her before or while she has been with me here in Sabang? Phil gave me an apologetic grimace and replied, “both mate” .

At this stage in my relationship with Rosie I wasn’t exactly sure how I felt about her, for me there was a torrent of feelings and most of them were contradictory. On the one hand I realized she was a hardened bar girl and very much a product of her environment but on the other hand I had taken her out of the bar and she was my lover as well as my friend. Or so I thought. I felt pangs of jealousy juxtaposed by my worldly logic that said what do you expect she is a bar girl, this is the only way she knows how to survive. I felt a sense of betrayal by both Rosie and Phil but then again they had known each other long before I had known either one of them and besides who was I to tell Rosie she could not fuck around when here I was banging the land lady’s daughter. Should I be upset or should I be relieved, should I feel betrayed or should I just put it down to life’s experiences, should I be proprietary and impress upon this big bloke whose woman she was or should I just not take it personally and let it slide.
As I sat there speechless for what seemed like an eternity but was probably only a couple of minutes the gamut of emotions bombarded my mind like items of clothing in a tumble dryer and this must have been obvious by my facial expressions because Phil actually reached over placed his big hand on my arm and said “you ok there mate”? When I felt his hand on my arm I was jolted out of my self indulgent musings and said, “get your fucking hand off me cunt” and straight away he pulled back like he was withdrawing his hand from the snapping jaws of a crocodile. Listen mate there’s no need to get all agro mate I’m just telling ya for your own good because I’m a mate and I thought you should know“. “Well if your such a mate why are you fucking my girlfriend” I replied and straight away he said well mate I don’t see her as your girlfriend and she don’t see you as her boyfriend”.

Those last words hit me like a sledge hammer completely taking the winds out of my sails and once he saw this Phil stood up and using the extra 3 inches he had over me told me “sit down mate and lets have a fucking drink. I reckon you could do with one right now”. With this said he proffered me two rum and cokes and then it suddenly dawned on me why he had ordered four in the first place. I took one look at the big guy towering over me and thought to myself maybe discretion is the better part of valor besides the semblance of rationality I had left was dictating that I should stay and talk with Phil in an effort to find out more details before I decided on the best course of action.

So mate I asked in a calmer voice how long has this been going on and he replied by saying mate ever since the first night you came to the compound. When he said this he could see my temper beginning to boil again so he said no mate it’s not like that remember where you are, this is the Philippines and everything’s all fucked up over here”. I replied mate just because it’s the Philippines that doesn’t mean you should change your values and start doing things like fucking your mates girl friend”. When he heard this Phil just smiled and said “I would like to agree with ya but the fact is you’re wrong Marty. Over here in the PI you gotta change and go with the flow mate coz if you don’t you will go fucking bonkers”. In the years to come I was to face this dilemma many times and I think the answer is to adapt a little bit but at the same time maintain the nucleus of what makes you, you. Phil was right, to survive in the Philippines for any length of time you have to adapt and often that means throwing your beliefs and to some extent your morals out the window but at the same time always keep a part of what you used to be inside, otherwise there will be nothing which separates you from the Filipinos.

Even though his words were not exactly calming me down I let my cool head prevail thinking I need to find out more info before I do anything and besides if I am going to get this big bastard I better make it a surprise attack or else there was no way I was going to win. So mate what do suggest I do about this I said which caused Phil to look at me and say well mate there’s not much you can do mate the damage has been done. But Marty it wasn’t personal mate Rosie is just a bar whore mate and it’s probably better your mates do her than some bloke you don’t know”. When I heard this I actually spat my drink out onto the sand and asked what did you just say and big Phil just smiled and said yeah I know mate my reaction was the same when some cunt first told me that but it’s fair dinkum mate. You are better off having your girl rooting your mates than some bloke you don’t even know”.

At first I couldn’t believe what I had just heard and I wondered if Phil was serious but when I looked across the table at him I saw no trace of mirth in the mans eyes and I realized he was deadly serious. I looked at him and said mate you are just trying to justify doing the dirty on me and this is when he shook his head and said, “well you may see it as doing the dirty on ya but I see it as doing you a favor because I have taught you how it is around here and I have shown you what sort of girl Rosie is. Now don’t get me wrong mate I like a girl who bangs like a dunny door in the wind as much as the next man but mate now I have shown you how she truly is ask yourself is that the sort of girl you really want to get involved with?”.

Well I thought to myself if that doesn’t just top off everything here is this guy who has been fucking my girl and now he wants to tell me he was doing me a favor. Of course at this stage of my Philippine development this logic made absolutely no sense at all but many years later I was to find myself using exactly the same logic when answering a friends question about his girlfriends activities. Now, now I know what your thinking, Martin has been fucking one of his mates girlfriends but if this is what you are thinking then you are wrong. Remember how I stated earlier if you live here you have to adapt but at the same time keep some of what makes you, you. Well part of what I have kept is the belief that there is right and wrong and fucking your friends girl friend just doesn’t seem right to me no matter what angle I look at it from or what justifications I may employ. As a result I have never fucked a mates girlfriend well not while she was his girlfriend anyway and I probably never will.

With these words of wisdom spoken Phil made to get up and go but I grabbed his arm and said “wait a minute mate you said that you weren’t the only one fucking Rosie so could you tell me who the other dickheads are” to which he replied “well Marty let’s just put it this way it’s two other blokes who live in the compound mate” . Now I was pissed and it must have shown because Phil moved his chair a few inches away from me and said “calm down a bit mate I keep telling you this is not personal. Tell me mate how much money are you giving Rosie?” When he asked this I realized that I had been giving Rosie next to nothing and here was reality lesson number 2 these girls all need money. They may appear to have their own money or they may be independently wealthy or just to shy to come right out and ask you for it but the bottom line is they always need money.

When Phil asked this it had the calming down effect he was aiming for and I somewhat sheepishly replied “to be honest mate I give her fuck all” and then Phil smiled and said mate always give your girl some money. I’m not saying this will stop her from fucking around but it will decrease the chances and it will solve you many problems if you adopt this policy here in the Philippines. It’s all about the pera mate.” So there it was an economic reality slap in the face and yet somehow this didn’t make me feel bad at all. In fact I think this was a handy excuse that I could cling to and use to massage my bruised ego. Now I could say to myself these other guys are cunts but they didn’t mean it personally and as for Rosie well she was only doing it for the money.

Phil saw me calming down a bit and said ok mate time to finish our piss and lets get back to the disco I got a sheila I was eyeing off tonight and I reckon I can pull her no problem. With this said he stood up and slowly ambled off in the direction of Sabang Disco leaving me to order five more rum and cokes while I pondered my situation. I have no idea how long I sat there just pondering what Phil had told me but next thing I knew the lady who owned the sari-sari store was making noises for me to pay up because it was late and she wanted to close. I rummaged through my pockets found a couple of hundred and laid them on the table which seemed to please her no end as she grabbed the money and surprisingly quickly for someone her age disappeared behind the sari-sari store. Now left on my own and with a head full of Tanduay Rum I stumbled towards the Sabang Disco showed the door man my entrance stamp from earlier that night and stepped inside only to see Rosie dancing with big Phil. When I saw this I knew exactly what the saying seeing red like a bull meant and as all rationale thoughts flew out of my head I crossed the dance floor shoved Rosie aside and took a massive swing at big Phils jaw.

Memoirs of a Philippine Mongerer

The ultimate hangover cure

When it comes to hangovers I am now somewhat of an expert so much so that sometimes I feel like I was born with one. However, back in 1991 a hangover was a relatively new experience and to this day 19 years later I can still remember the hangover I woke up with in Peurto Galera. On a scale of one to ten this was a nine, my whole body ached and my head felt like someone was playing with jack hammers inside my brain. This was a mammoth hangover and as I stumbled out of bed looking in vain for a bottle of water, I remembered my fathers tales detailing the evils of rum and I thought to myself, hey dad now I know where you’re coming from. Over the years I have heard many people say Tanduay rum is actually quite a decent rum but ever since that morning I have been put off for life and in my drinking sessions I make dam sure to avoid Tanduay.

Even though my eyes could barely focus I somehow managed to find a bottle of mineral water and now all I had to do was rummage through my bag and find some Panadol which would hopefully stop my splitting headache. For many years my mother suffered from migranes and sometimes they were so bad the doctor would come along and just knock her out with a jab of morphine. Luckily myself and my brother never inherited the migranes but watching my mothers agony had made me acutely aware just how unpleasant headaches could be and this morning I found myself yearning for the family doctor and the loving embrace of his morphine needle.

Not having my family doctor in Peurto Galera and certainly not having access to Morphine I decided I would have to swallow a couple of Panadols and just hope they would do the trick. After what seemed like forever I finally managed to find the Panadols so I popped two straight down my throat washed them down with a gulp of water and then lay down waiting for them to take effect. Within twenty minutes I felt the gentle relief of the paracetamol based Panadol begin to kick in and as the waves of splitting headache began to recede and as the need to sleep overtook me I suddenly realized Rosie was nowhere to be seen. I couldn’t for the life of me remember if I had slept with Rosie the night before but there was a nagging doubt that she had been missing and as the sweet clouds of sleep embraced my aching head I made a mental note to check up on Rosie’s whereabouts when I woke up.

I have no idea how long I slept for but when I woke up my head was still throbbing so I just lay still and let the fact that I was awake and had to face the world slowly dawn on me. As I lay there I heard the sound of female laughter gently drift inside the hut so nursing my throbbing head I slowly made it to a vertical position and walked outside to see where this sound was coming from. As soon as I made it through the door blinding daylight hit me so I promptly turned round and went through my bag to find my sunglasses. Daylight is certainly not the hung over mans best friend and even though I now had dark sunglasses on it still took my eyes about 20 seconds to adjust. Once I had my bearings and I could see without squinting I gazed out into what I now considered as my front yard and there was Rosie and Juvie laughing and chatting away as they prepared some sort of food on the barbeque. Rather than interrupt them I decided to just sit back and observe this special moment that was just so typical of life in the Philippines.

I went back inside got my bottle of water and two more Panadols and then just sat down by the little table on my veranda and watched the two girls interact. They were jabbering away in Tagalog and of course I couldn’t understand a word but I did hear my name mentioned a couple of times and that of Phil as well. I was just sitting there minding my own business hoping that Juvie hadn’t told Rosie about our little encounter when all of a sudden it occurred to me that Rosie definitely hadn’t slept with me last night so where the hell had she been. I was pondering the best approach to ask her when as if she had read my thoughts she looked up spotted me and smiled. During my years here I have often encountered the Filipinas unerring ability to tap into their sixth sense almost as if they can read my mind. For example I have often talked about a girl with a customer without either one of us even looking at the girl. There is no way the girl could have heard our conversation as the music is far to loud and yet somehow she will pick up on our thoughts like she has some kind of mental telepathy. On many occasions I have noticed this and we have now coined the term bar girl radar to describe just this.

When Rosie saw me she gave me a beaming smile and blew me a kiss whilst Juvie just gave me a friendly little wave. When I saw this all thoughts of wrong doing on Rosie’s behalf disappeared and I felt myself melting as I became a slave yet again to her feminine charms. As I sat there wondering if those jack hammers would ever stop reverberating in my brain Rosie approached me and asked would you like lunch to which I replied I will try to eat something but I am not sure if I can hold anything down. The look on her face told me she was not familiar with the expression hold anything down but still she got the general gist of my conversation because she looked at me and said “that what happen when you to much drunk”.

When Rosie put her mind to it she was actually a passable cook but most of the time she either just couldn’t be bothered or she was so used to the spoilt bar life that she deemed it beneath her to cook for her man. On the other hand there were times when she would surprise me and for seemingly no reason at all would cook a delicious meal and make sure I eat every last morsel. Rosie was in some ways a contradictory and complicated package which was all to be revealed to me during the time we were in Peurto Galera. Rosies attitude was not exactly what I would call friendly let alone submissive or overtly feminine. She was a professional bar girl with a heart of stone when needed and certainly a little slutty around the edges. Having said this she did have several assets not the least of which was the fact that she had great boobs and when she put her mind to it could suck a bowling ball through a garden hose.

I was certainly fond of Rosie but I would never say I was in love with her. Yes she became a friend and yes she was always a good lover but no matter how much time I spent with her I couldn’t quite make that final leap and say what I was feeling was love. I think in my heart of hearts I wanted the ‘girl friend experience’ and I even wanted the ‘in love’ experience yet something always held me back. Maybe it was David’s words of wisdom, maybe it was a emotional safety reaction on my behalf after Hilda’s death, maybe it was because of fear of commitment or maybe it was just plain old common sense which dictated that Rosie and girls of her ilk were at the end of the day bar girls who were in many ways incapable of abiding by the rules that govern a normal relationship. As for Rosie even though I spent near on nine months with her I could never really say what she felt. Unlike most Filipinas she was not demonstrative or overt with her feelings and there were many times during our relationship where I would catch myself just gazing at her wondering what was going on behind those pretty Chinese eyes.

After lunch had been consumed by myself and the girls Juvie asked if Rosie and I would like a little sight seeing tour of Sabang to which Rosie eagerly agreed to and as such I had to as well even though it was the last thing I felt like doing. We started off walking back to the pool hall where once again Rosie dragged us in and the young Filipino guy whom I had met before approached us, said hello to me and the girls both of whom he knew and then asked if I would like another game of pool. By this stage I had heard about the local pool hustlers but I didn’t have much else to do and rather than offend him I agreed to a few games while the girls sat and watched.

For the first two games we were evenly tied at one game each and then sure enough for the third game the Filipino guy wanted to play for money. He started off at 500 piso per game but I pled lack of money and said much better we play for 100. He didn’t seem to impressed with this but faced with the choice of playing for 100 or letting the foreigner mark escape he agreed. Strangely enough that game I seemed to play like a freaking expert and his game just went to shit and I ended up winning convincingly. After I had won the guy then said to me “see you should have play for five hundred you win to easy. Maybe you hustler”. When I heard this I automatically knew this was the beginning of the hustle and he would be insisting the next game we played should be for 500. With this in mind I decided to circumvent matters by saying, “well thanks for the game dude but I have to go. Tell you what you keep the hundred piso you owe me and we can play double or nothing next time I come back”. I am not sure if he understood what I was saying but while he was trying to figure it out I motioned to the girls that it was time to leave and walked out the door.

That day we must have trapped all over Sabang stopping at various food houses and sari sari stores for a rest or just a cool drink. Juvie was one of these rare Filipinas who seemed to enjoy walking and was not afraid of physical exercise whereas Rosie on the other hand was very obviously not enjoying herself and was probably asking herself what the heck have I gotten myself in for. Looking back on this little excursion I can only remember scanty details but some things that stick out in my mind are Sabang Disco which I was to later on become very familiar with, Luckys Austrian food house which was nearing completion and the walk up the hill where Alan Nash has now built the Point Bar.

Half way up the hill Rosie decided to give it in and with an exasperated tone of voice told me “I go back Lucky no like walk to much tired”. This was followed by a rapid Tagalog conversation with Juvie and then Rosie turned round and started heading back down the hill. I looked at Juvie for some sort of guidance but all she could do was smile at me and say “no problema for Rosie, we go top hill then go back for Rosie”. I wasn’t exactly feeling 100 percent but I figured a little exercise would probably do me a world of good when it came to fighting the persistent hang over. With the ever energetic Juvie leading the way and me huffing and puffing behind her with my eyes firmly fixed on her jiggling buttocks we slowly made it to the top of the hill and when we got there a truly splendid view of the Sabang, La Lalaguna and the ocean greeted us.

Juvie stopped sat on a rock and beckoned for me to sit with her. Feeling like a little rest I gladly did so and next thing I knew she was kissing me passionately. At first I was a bit taken aback but not being one to miss out on an opportunity I found myself responding eagerly and next thing I knew Juvie had her hands down my pants and was pulling my cock out. I looked around to make sure nobody was watching and then having confirmed we were all on our own sat back and just enjoyed the sensation as Juvie wrapped her lips around me and proceeded to give me a toe curling blow job.

Sitting there on a rock in the bush looking out over a aqua marine ocean with a beautiful young Filipina lasciviously sucking on my male member was as close to paradise as I had ever been and I thought to myself life doesn’t get much better than this and best of all my nagging hangover induced headache had literally been blown away.

Memoirs of a Philippine Mongerer

Our little hut by the sea was in fact part of a compound which was occupied by a couple of Australians, Germans and some Americans all of whom seemed like a great bunch of guys. I was certainly the newbie amongst this lot as most of them had been coming to the Philippines for at least five years and all of them were more than familiar with the ins and outs of Peurto Galera.

Before I knew it the days events had caught up with me and after eating it was time for a little nap. I lay down with Rosie beside me on our little bed reveling in the breeze gently blowing trough the window and slowly drifted off to sleep listening to the sounds of small waves gently lap against the shore.

I slept for about three hours and when I woke up I reached for Rosie only to find she wasn’t there. Groggily I stumbled outside where I saw Rosie sitting by the barbeque tending to a grilled fish whilst chatting with this big white guy. I approached hesitantly put my arm around Rosie and said “there you are I missed you babe”. When he saw me the big guy was momentarily taken aback but quickly overcame his surprise to introduce himself as Phil from Australia. “Gooday mate” he said, “nice to meet ya. Me names Phil. I was just chatting to me old mate Rosie here known her for yonks mate. Great Sheila mate, reckon you done well”. With this he gave Rosie a beaming smile then held out a huge hand for me to shake.

Phil must have stood about 6 foot 3 with dark hair drunken brown eyes and a barrel chest. There wasn’t an ounce of fat on the big guy and I estimated him at being about 27 years old. As I stood there with my arm around Rosie trying to bravely mark my territory I couldn’t help but think, I hope this guy doesn’t go off it would be a real problem trying to handle this big bastard. As it turned out Phil was basically a gentle soul with a cigarette permanently hanging out of one side of his mouth and a bottle of Tanduay Rum out of the other. Later on in the piece I was to find out just how well he knew Rosie and how recently he had renewed that friendship but for now he seemed like a genuinely friendly sort of guy so I shook his hand with vigor and offered to have a drink with him.

With the offer of a drink Phil’s face lit up and he said “sure thing mate give us a couple of hundred and I’ll go buy what we need”. I forked out 200 piso and Phil with a smile took the money and said “I’ll be back in half an hour mate”. Sure enough he was good to his word, 30 minutes later he returned with two packets of cigarettes two bottles of Tanduay 3 bottles of coke and a plastic container full of ice. Phil plonked himself down on the wooden chair on my huts veranda placing the booze and plastic container on a little wooden table then called me to come join him. “I reckon Rosie will take care of the fish mate, how’s about you and me having a little drink”.

Phil and I sat there for about forty minutes smoking cigarettes drinking Tanduay and coke, watching the sun set and just generally getting to know each other when from out of nowhere three other guys appeared and asked if they could join us. Phil seemed to know them and before I knew it we had five of us all sitting around the barbeque area quaffing down Tanduay and coke like there was no tomorrow.

When the other guys joined us it was obvious that Rosie and mines solitary fish wasn’t going to suffice so I asked Phil, “where can I get some more fish or something to put on the barbeque to feed the guys”? He smiled and said “no worries there mate just give Rosie five hundred and send her up to see nanay or her daughter. They know the lay of the land mate and will see ya right”. I could feel the effects of Tanduay Rum beginning to kick in now and I knew I had better get something to eat before my head was spinning so I called Rosie over gave her 500 piso and asked her to go see nanay and buy some food for me and the boys. Rosie looked at me with a look that said, what did your last slave die of, grabbed the money and headed off towards nanays house.

While Rosie was gone the boys and I started on a fairly heavy drinking session. These guys were all Australian and were not exactly new to the drinking scene in Peurto Galera or any place else for that matter. There names were Jimmy Buckets, John Cockran and Koripot Bob. All of them lived in the same little compound as myself and Rosie and all of them seemed like hard core Philippine veterans. At this stage I realized I was still a comparative newbie and I was all ears as these boys enlightened me on survival techniques in the Philippines all over copious amounts of rum of course.

It wasn’t long before Rosie was back carrying what looked like a couple of fish, some boiled rice, some squid and some vegetables. Now as most people know I am no slouch when it comes to drinking but these boys were making me look like a rank amateur. It seemed to me that this was their nightly event and this impression was further confirmed when Jimmy Buckets suddenly said, “welcome to our little group Marty I reckon you’ll fit right in mate”. When Buckets said this I felt kind of honored like I had been accepted into the inner circle of friends or something. Of course this meant nothing to Rosie who when I asked for the change gave me a look of seething contempt and replied “wala”.

By now the second bottle of rum was getting empty so Phil asked me for another hundred which I drunkenly handed over and he then took it to Rosie and said, “can you fetch us some more Rum Rosie me love” and gave her a little pat on her behind. I was expecting Rosie to say something along the lines of get your own bloody drink but all she did was smile and reply ooh ooh then off she trotted. I remember thinking through the alcohol sodden haze how the heck did Phil do that but then at that stage thinking anything more complicated than whats my name was beyond my capacity, so I just let my mind slide into drunken numbness that is typical of life in the Philippines.

Rosie was back seemingly in a jiffy and following close behind was Jovie carrying plates and cutlery. When I saw Jovie I immediately turned a bright red and I was sure Rosie would notice it but instead she seemed to have eyes only for Phil and as it turned out all the boys new Jovie anyway and were quite effusive in their greetings to her. Rosie and Jovie started to prepare the food whilst Phil poured another round of rum and cokes and it was once more into the breach for poor Martin. By the time we had finished the next round the food was ready and we all stumbled towards the barbeque to fill our rumbling stomachs. Due to the lack of chairs we all sat on the sand by the barbeque and continued talking and drinking as we consumed the fish, rice and some sort of undefined vegetable with great gusto . I am sure under normal circumstances I would not have even looked twice at this meal but sitting on the beach in an alcohol induced stupor with my new found friends and a gentle breeze blowing off the sea, this meal seemed somehow perfect.

While we were eating Rosie and Jovie were making acquaintance with each other and I couldn’t help but wonder what they were talking about. Admittedly I was worried that Jovie would let slip about the afternoons activities between us but if she did Rosie never showed any sign of it and the evening progressed along with everybody being happy and friendly. At the time I did not realize it but the company of good friends, tall tales and copious amounts of booze was soon to be the story of my life in Peurto Galera and I would literally have to drag myself away and force myself into another lifestyle but that was in the future and for now I just felt pleasantly intoxicated and at peace with myself.

The evening progressed along and even though I was getting totally fucked up I could see the signs of wear and tear on the others and it became a point of pride that I wasn’t going to let these boys drink me under the table. I had enjoyed numerous drinking sessions in Australia and had always managed to hold my own so I wasn’t about to let these guys whom I had only just met, get the better of me. As the night wore on the supply of Tandauy rum seemed never ending until at last Jimmy Buckets drunkenly proclaimed “I’ve done me fucking bolt lads and I’ll see youze all tomorrow”. With that grand announcement made, Jimmy managed to slowly struggle to his feet where he wobbled precariously unti Koripot Bob managed to stand up beside him and together the two of them stumbled of towards their respective huts. This left myself John and big Phil and even though my head was reeling I wasn’t about to give in and let these two get the better of me. I decided the best form of defense was offense and I sluringly asked one more round boys at which John looked at me with disgust and said “no thanks mate but I got to piss off bloody worlds spinning and I gotta visit Manila tomorrow “. This left me and big Phil who simply smiled at me and said, “yeah sure thing Marty I could go another”.

I think myself and Phil stayed there for another hour or so until we finished off the fourth bottle and then thankfully Phil slowly stood up and said “well I gotta go mate, sleep well and give my love to Rosie”. With that said he slowly stumbled off into the distance and as I watched him depart I thought to myself well done Martin you showed those guys. With my self congratulatory praise still ringing in my head I tried to gain my feet only to find myself lying down on the sand. At first I thought somebody had tripped me so I looked around, only to find fresh air. Right, I thought to myself, slow it down a bit you are pissed Martin, just concentrate and take it easy. Using my last dregs of common sense I manged to gain my feet and stumble the fifteen yards to my hut where I ascended the steps gently opened the door and gratefully collapsed onto my empty bed.

Memoirs of a Philippine Mongerer

Of course I like my women wearing sexy provocative clothing which titillates the imagination like a tight clinging dress that accentuates the Coca-Cola bottle like curves or a sexy negligee that reveals just enough to excite whilst keeping just enough hidden to maintain that element of mystery. But at the same time for me there is just something about an earthy type woman who revels in her femininity and exudes sexuality. These women have no need of sexy clothing or expensive jewelry, theirs is a natural sexuality that comes from within and needs no accentuating by artificial means. I have always found myself attracted to the natural look no makeup to highlight certain features and hide others, no padding, no nips and tucks, just plain what you see is what you get. This is what the Filipinos refer to as a “natural beauty” and this earthy appeal was personified by the landlady’s daughter.

Her name was Jovielyn and as soon as we were out of sight of the compound she looked around as if to make sure nobody was watching then grabbed my hair pulling me down to her level and proceeded to kiss me like there was no tomorrow. At first I was a little shocked by this sweet young girl behaving in such a manner but hey I wasn’t about to stop her or put up any fight. This was a display of wanton, aggressive sexual passion, yes I felt a little bit like a toy boy or just an object that was a means to a young woman’s ends but I also realized it’s pretty obvious this girl knows what she’s doing and if she wanted to use me to satiate her sexual desires then she could go right ahead and do it.

The kiss lasted for about 1 minute then just before parting she shoved her tongue down my throat and said “Jovie like you, ikaw masarap”. At this stage I had no idea what this meant but then again it didn’t really matter she had made her intentions perfectly clear as had I by the obscene bulge in my pants. After the cinemascope type kiss Jovie proceeded to lead the way to Captain Greg’s and as she walked in front of me I was literally transfixed by the saucy swaying of her hips and her tight firm buttocks jiggling up and down with each step she took. After a while we reached Sabang pool hall where I saw the same young Filipino guy who had been chatting to Rosie and as Jovie and I approached. Obviously he knew Jovie because as we approached he gave her a beaming smile said something in Tagalog which caused both he and Jovie to look at me then grin mischievously and then he turned to me and said in perfect English “hi sir how are you”. At first I was a little bit taken aback by the fluent English but recovered quick enough to think come on Martin you know better than to judge a book by its cover so I simply replied “I am doing fine, thanks for asking”. After hearing this the young man smiled at me again said something in Tagalog to Jovie and then he asked me “sir you leave Rosie in house”? I replied “yeah I left her with Jovies mum but hey mate this isn’t how it looks Jovie and I are just on our way back to Captain Gregs to pick up the gear then I am moving into one of the bungalows”. At the time I wondered why I was busy explaining myself to a young Filipino man who I hardly knew so then deciding offence is the best form of defense I asked him straight out “why are you asking”? Automatically he picked up on the slight aggressive intonation in my voice so he smiled again said no sir you don’t understand, Rosie good friend to my girlfriend, Rosie friend to me only”. This assurance was delivered very smoothly especially for a Filipino beach bum and next thing I knew I found myself shaking his hand and promising to come play some pool after I had settled in.

Jovie led the way back through the twisting turning alley ways with the Filipino’s going about their daily business and everywhere she went women and men alike would stop what they were doing and greet her. It was very obvious Jovie was well known in Sabang and I made a mental note to myself if I ever needed anything in a hurry I would ask Jovie. This girl had the island wired and would probably be able to help me find something better than anybody else. As a secondary mental note I also promised myself that I would never piss her off as it wouldn’t be a particularly pleasant experience having an angry Jovie and ten young Filipino guys bashing down my door all looking to teach the arrogant foreigner a lesson.

Eventually we made it back to Captain Greg’s where I informed them I would be checking out and Jovie surprise-surprise knew the receptionist who looked at me as if to say and where do you think you are going with this girl but then burst out in a sweet smile as Jovie said something in Tagalog and we proceeded to my room to pack my bags and move to my new abode. Jovie seemed to know her way around Captain Greg’s and as soon as she had opened my door she shut it behind us locked it and proceeded to literally tear my clothes of in her urgent need to engage in what was obviously going to be a first class torrid sexual encounter. Now I look back on this encounter several strange occurences stick in my mind. Firstly Jovie never insisted herself or I take a shower before having sex. This is unusual for a Filipina as normally they are very fastidious about their cleanliness surpassed only by the Thais but I got the feeling Jovie didn’t have time for pleasantries, she wanted some dick and nothing or nobody was going to stand in her way.

Juvie was really a whirlwind after kissing me passionately whilst standing she then pushed me down onto the bed pulled down my shorts and was wrapped her soft lips around the head of my cock gently licking and sucking whilst at the same time stroking it with her petite little hands. Somehow I just got the feeling this wasn’t the first time she had given a blowjob and this was combined with the feeling that I was somewhat irrelevant in this process Jovie was a woman who when it came to sex had strong urges and she let those urges rule her no matter what. She was like a sexual hedonist when she wanted it, she wanted it , she gave into her sexual needs with wild abandon living purely for the moment regardless of the consequences. To say that Jovie was a wild ride would be an understatement, this girl was more like a hurricane ripping through a nippa hut village.

As soon as Jovies lips were wrapped around my cock I had a hard on that I could have knocked someone out with and Jovie being the good girl wasn’t about to waste it . Straight away she ripped of her top and her little wrap around dress which was more like a sarong, pulled down her underpants and before I knew she was riding my pole like a professional rodeo rider. What surprised me about Jovie was even though it was all about her personal satisfaction and she was a wild vocal young lady she was also one of these women who liked to take her time and was amazingly sensual. At first she rode me like a woman gone wild letting out little moans that were gradually getting louder and louder then suddenly she would slow down and just rub her clitoris against me all the time getting louder and louder. I think Jovie was having a series of mini orgasms whilst ridding me because she kept on shuddering and moaning then when she actually turned round so I could see that cute little ass sliding up and down on my pole and I noticed my cock was very wet .

Jovie must of helped herself for half an hour and in a myriad of positions until she turned to me and said “honey you be the one to drive”. Not being backwards in coming forwards I grabbed the opportunity bent her over and entered her from behind in the classic doggy style position. Doggy style has always been my favorite as it allows the man to regulate the rhythm and there is just something about pile driving a nice petite Filipina. Most Filipinas have nice tight little brown bums and there is just something to be said for placing ones thumbs in the little dimple marks just above their ass and using these as leverage thrusting in and out like there is no tomorrow. As for the Filipinas I find their frame subtly deceiving for such small framed girls it’s quite amazing how much pounding they can take and give out as well. Most importantly the majority of the ones I have encountered seem to actually enjoy vigorous sex which of course is right up my alley.

Jovie was certainly one of the girls who enjoyed an extended rigorous encounter and as I hit my stride pounding in and out like a piston Jovie was getting louder and louder. I pushed her head into the pillow thinking the occupants of the room next door would think I was a mass murderer or something but Jovie was in full voice and nothing I did seem to make any difference. As I hit full stride the bed was banging against the wall Jovie was virtually screaming in paroxysms of delight and then just as I was about to cum I pulled out and hosed her back with my cum when suddenly I felt a gush of warm liquid splashing my balls so I looked down and there was Jovie squirting.

I had often heard of girls who squirt when they cum but prior to this had always believed it to be some sort of urban myth. Now here it was right in front of me and my bed sheets were soaked. Just as well I was moving out since I was having visions of trying to explain the wet bed sheets to Rosie and I had absolutely no idea what I was going to say should I ever run into the people from the room next door. Feeling a little foolish sitting there in the biggest post coital wet spot I had ever seen made me feel a little foolish and awkward until Jovie looked round and with a rather sheepish look said sorry po I do like that. When I saw the look on her face the humor of the situation suddenly overtook me so sitting there holding my dick whilst floundering in a pool of female love juice I could do nothing but laugh despite Jovies obvious embarrassment.

This had been a tremendously enjoyable sexual encounter and even though I was completely shagged out and could have done with a good 2 hour rest I realized time was of the essence if we were to get away with this without anyone knowing then it was time to bungle Jovie into the shower along with myself then pack up the bags and head back to Jovies mothers place. I wasn’t sure how I would handle facing Jovies mother knowing how I had just drilled her daughter but with a tight little body like Jovies and such an enthusiastic performance I thought explaining to her mother was the least of my worries. Little Jovie had certainly been a real find and as I showered with her lathering soap on her back some of David’s advice came back to me “Marty my mate always fuck as much as you can mate because you never know when it’s your last”.

As we checked out of Captain Greg’s the waitress gave myself and Jovie knowing looks and even a furtive little smile in my direction and I remember thinking where else in the world could you get away with this shit what a great country. To this day I still don’t know what happened to the sheets and 19 years later I am still a little hesitant to return to Captain Greg’s in case the alarms go off and the staff say oh look here comes the bed wetter we remember him.

After checking out Jovie and I once again navigated the streets of Sabang and made our way back to her mothers place. Jovie of course now being sexually satiated didn’t want to know about carrying any luggage so while I was the pack horse lugging Rosie’s and my bags Jovie just sauntered freely waving and laughing with her friends as if she didn’t have a care in the world. Even though I was bogged down with luggage I could have sworn some of the people were looking at me and saying stuff like there goes Jovies latest victim. Maybe this was all in my imagination or maybe reality but one thing was for sure this little nymph had been one hell of a ride and to this day I get a hard-on just thinking about her.

After 20 minutes of walking we were back at Jovies mothers compound where I thanked Jovie for her help even though I was the one to carry the bags and then I made my way to our cottage. Our cottage was the one furthest away from the main office area so it was a short stroll and then when I turned the corner there sitting on my new porch was the Filipino guy from the pool hall. When he saw me coming he at first looked a little strange almost like he was guilty of something but recovered quickly and was soon offering to carry the bags and help me into my new house. I entered the little shack and there was Rosie brushing her wet hair. When she saw me she broke out in a big smile and proudly announced hon I like Peurto Galera but gutom na ako (I’m hungry now).

Memoirs of a Philippine Mongerer

Sabang.

At first when the Albert announced the lack of fuel I was more than a little bit perturbed. At that stage I was a good swimmer and I was fairly sure I could make it to either one of the beaches I could see on either side of me but if I did this what would I do with Rosie and how about my luggage and possessions. I could just see me doing my macho hero act and swimming to shore while Albert inextricably discovered he still had some fuel and with a flick of a switch went chugging off into the sunset with Rosie and all my possessions.

So there we sat with a nervous Rosie jabbering away to a placid Albert who although we were floating aimlessly didn’t seem to have a worry in the world. In fact I got the distinct feeling this wasn’t Albert’s first occasion at running out of fuel hence his apparent lack of care. I was just contemplating this thinking to myself if this has happened before why doesn’t the clown carry spare fuel with him then just as I was about to ask him another bunker boat came into view heading straight for us.

In no time the other bunker had pulled up beside us and after a rapid exchange of Tagalog two guys started pouring diesel from a jerry can into our boats engine. After they had finished Albert hurriedly started the motor and then looked at me expectantly. I asked Rosie why is he looking at me like that and she replied “honey you pay fuel”. At this stage I was a comparative new comer but I was already resigned to the fact that somehow the foreigner always seems to end up paying. I dug through my wallet found 200 piso handed it over to Albert whilst thinking I will take that off the end amount when we reach Sabang.

The crossing to Sabang is actually quite a short journey and in no time we were gazing across the water at Sabang beach which lay glistening in the sun on the horizon. From a distance Sabang looked very picturesque but this impression was soon to change as we got closer and I got a more in depth view of the place. Sabang from a distance look like a glittering jewel in the sunshine but this impression is soon dispersed as you get closer. At this stage in my life I had within the preceding two years stayed in the Maldives for 4 months so I was expecting to see pristine sparkling white sand beaches with crystal clear aqua marine water gently lapping at the shore. Instead the sight that greeted me was more like a tropical version of a working class English seaside resort. The buildings were basic, old and shabby with corrugated iron roofs and on the side the brown slimy stain of sewerage trails gently seeping into the surrounding sea. The buildings were somewhat like a maze all crammed close to each other with very little privacy offered. Looking at this I felt more than slightly disappointed as it was very evident that in typical Filipino style they had just piled one building on top of another without any rudimentary planning or design work. My first impression of Sabang was this is nothing better than a concrete and iron camping ground on a sewerage strewn beach. Where was pristine sandy white beach, where were my little huts precariously balanced on stilts, where was the beautiful aqua marine water teaming with fish? This wasn’t my Robinson Crusoe lifestyle and it certainly wasn’t my luxurious tropical retreat. As I looked at Sabang a feeling of disappointment slowly descended and I found myself wondering what the hell I was doing here.

The banca boat slowly drifted into the main part of Sabang and when we were ten feet from the shore he Albert cut the engine and just let the boat gently run aground. We descended from the boat with Albert demanding to carry the luggage which he unceremoniously dumped on the sand and then held his hand out. I asked Rosie what’s he doing and she replied “you pay her now” . I asked Rosie to ask him how much and received the reply from Albert ‘500 piso”. I looked at Albert somewhat aghast and asked him have I bought the entire boat which elicited a smile and the reply “no, boat cost 2 hundred thousand”. I fished around in my wallet looking for three one hundred peso bills but of course the smallest I could find was a 500. I handed over the 500 to Albert and said “I don’t suppose you have two hundred piso change” to which he just smiled and shook his head. I figured I should deduct the two hundred I had paid for fuel but for the life of me I couldn’t see anywhere that would offer change so I just handed him the 500 grabbed my bags and started walking towards the nearest building of any significance with the plan of asking someone where was Big Apple resort.

With me carrying the bags and a somewhat churlish Rosie following behind we walked up the beach and entered the rabbit warren of small alleyways and ramshackle buildings that was Sabang back in those days. We negotiated the streets of Sabang but seemed to be getting nowhere so I asked Rosie to get some directions to Captain Gregs which caused another angry look but she did humble herself and ask the next woman she saw the directions. After another 15 minutes of negotiating the alleys of Sabang we finally made it to Captain Greg’s were we checked in and then indulged ourselves in a round of torrid sex before crashing out for the night wondering what tomorrow would bring.

The next morning after a late breakfast Rosie and I decided to have a look around Sabang mainly because I was sure there had to be more to this place than what I had seen on our arrival. I couldn’t believe that the much vaunted Sabang could be such a boring shit hole. We started out strolling through the alleyways again with me just absorbing the daily Filipino lifestyle. People were squatting outside their ramshackle houses doing the washing, some over made up garish looking girls decked out in bright shiny dresses were making their way home after a nights workout, small Filipino dogs were running around everywhere most of them barking at me to prove this was their territory and the big foreigner didn’t scare them at all. There were a number of bars and pubs most of which were not open and the daily supplies of san Miguel beer and bottles of Tanduay rum were being delivered by hand. The standard of housing was much as I had seen from the boat ramshackle and slovenly. Everywhere I looked snotty nosed kids would stare at me and the glares of the Filipino men were all verging on opportunistic to downright hostile. I did see a couple of girlie bars but at this time of day they were not operating so I took a mental note of their names and approximate location.

The main attraction of Sabang and Peurto Galera seemed to be diving as everywhere we went there were dive shops and signage advertising various dive tours. Not being a diver myself this didn’t particularly excite me but Rosie on the other hand seemed enthused and started telling me how an ex boy friend of hers used to take her snorkeling. I am not sure what Rosies motivation for telling me all about her ex was but I noticed she seemed to take a perverse delight in watching my reaction whenever she talked about him. At the time I should have recognized this behavior as a sign of things to come but I was still new and blissfully naïve so I just wrote it off as Rosie playing childish games and stayed determined to enjoy myself no matter what she did.

After a brisk ten minute walk we arrived at Sabang pool hall which I was to later find out was a general meeting place for the tourists on a budget. Basically the guys, both Filipino and foreigner, would hang out here drink cheap beer and play pool. The Filipinos were of course always looking for a chance to hustle and make some money whilst the foreigners were there to kill time and drink cheap beer. Later on I was to find out that this joint was a recognized place from which to purchase some weed and that explained why half the guys I saw there on my many visits were always spaced out and laid back. We stopped in Sabang Pool hall drank some coke and I played a couple of games of pool always losing but at five piso a game I figured what the heck it’s a cheap way to kill some time. While I was playing Rosie sat quietly in the corner talking with some young Filipino guy who later she told me new her best friend in Manila. I was a little bit suspicious of this but the guy seemed friendly enough and I thought to myself what the fuck it’s their country and I don’t understand what they are talking about anyway so I will just go with the flow.

While on my third unsuccessful attempt at winning a game of pool a flash of brilliance hit me as I suddenly remembered the lady we had met on the dock at Batangas and I rummaged through my wallet to find her now somewhat crumpled card. After I lost the next game of pool I headed over to Rosie and her new found Filipino friend and announced come on Rosie I am going to pay the bill and then lets go find that lady who we owns the hotel, you remember the one we met on Batangas pier. Realization slowly dawned on Rosie what I was talking about and she replied with a smile, “ok she nice lady much better we stay his place”.

Rosie showed her friend the card and asked where this place was to which the guy walked out with us and pointed with his lips. I looked at him thinking why is this guy blowing kisses up the road but Rosie seemed to understand completely and was soon strolling down the path as if she owned the place. After about five minutes walk the buildings gave way to another stretch of sand which for me was certainly a lot better than walking on the so called streets. As we reached the end of the minature beach Rosie suddenly veered inland and then as we turned the first corner she proudly announced “honey this ladies place same same on card”. By this time I was hot and sweaty, (a condition that was to become indicative of my everyday life in the Philippines), and it was with relief that I saw a nice little compound composed of individual nippa huts all over looking the beach along with what looked like a little restaurant which I instantly decided was the place we had to visit next.

We strolled up to the empty restaurant pulled up a chair each and then a pretty young girl who was obviously the waitress approached us and asked in halting English what we would like to order . Whilst admiring this provincial beauty with her provocatively swaying buttocks and pert little breasts I ordered a drink for myself and Rosie then when she returned with a refreshingly chilled bottles of mineral water I asked Rosie to show her the ladies card and see if she knew where she was. After a couple of swigs of water Rosie called th girl over again and showed her the card which caused the girl to break out in a beaming smile and proudly announce he my mother walang problema for a while I find mama.

Rosie and I sat there admiring the scenery and enjoying the gentle breeze lowing of the water and then almost like an apparition the lady who we had met on the pier was suddenly standing beside Rosie saying, “welcome to number 1 resort in Sabang” . The lady sat with us and engaged us in conversation for about half an hour. As it turned out her English was fairly good as she had spent 6 years in America working as a nurse and with her savings had returned to Sabang and set up her own resort. After we had cooled down and were feeling more relaxed she offered to show us around and since I was not particularly impressed with Captain Greg’s and for want of anything else to do I gladly accepted.

The tour of her little compound took all of ten minutes and it only took us viewing one hut for both Rosie and myself to decide we would much rather stay here. The huts were basic being composed of one double bed in the form of a cane bed and a thin mattress a small gas stove an overhead fan and a small window to let the breeze from the ocean cool things down. This was not exactly the Hilton but for 200 piso a night it was darn good value and Rosie certainly seemed to like it enough so for me it was an easy decision.

After seeing the huts I gave the lady one weeks deposit of 1400 piso then headed back to Captain Greg’s to pick up our gear and haul it back to our new home. As I was leaving Rosie asked if she could stay and have a chat with the lady and promised to make some lunch for me to eat when I returned. This seemed like a good idea as I figured Rosie would get the lay of the land much better than me so I sauntered off down the beach by myself. I had gone about one hundred yards when I heard a young female voice calling to me asking me to wait. I turned around and much to my delight saw my new land ladies daughter running down the beach with every part of her trim pert young anatomy invitingly waggling before my eyes. Being reminded of the movie ten I stopped instantaneously and as I watched her come closer I thought to myself there is a god after all.

Memoirs of a Philippine Mongerer

Batangas and beyond.

Getting off the bus and stepping foot on Batanags peer was in those days an adventure in itself. In the coming months I was to get used to it and had the place pretty well figured out but on my first visit there this was certainly not the case and I was hesitant to even leave the comparative safety of the bus. Rosie seeing my reservation said everything ok be nice to Filipino and Filipino nice to you. Now this may seem like stating the obvious but in years to come I was to learn just how much a simple smile and cheery disposition can help one avoid potentially dangerous situations.

We descended the bus steps with me carrying my rucksack tightly strapped to my back and as we hit the ground we were literally descended on by a horde of green shirt porters eager to carry our luggage. As they surrounded us Rosie went into overdrive telling each and everyone politely but firmly no thanks we can carry our own luggage. Slowly but surely we emerged from the crowd of porters only to find ourselves surrounded by raggedy kids all with their hands out crying hey Joe give money. Being still comparatively new at this my heart went out to the kids but Rosies previous warning echoed in my head so I simply brushed them aside and followed Rosie who was walking towards the peers end where a line of Filipinos had gathered waiting for the ferry.

It took us a further five minutes to negotiate our way through the kids and then I found myself sitting with my fellow bus passengers waiting for some mysterious boat to take us to Mindoro and the promised land of Peurto Galera. We waited there about ten minutes but still no sign of the ferry and since there was no shade available or anywhere to get a cold drink I took of my rucksack laid it on the ground and sat on it thus quashing any ambitions of a would be thief. While we were waiting there Rosie engaged a middle aged Filipina in conversation who it turned out had a series of bungalows on Sabang beach. After a while Rosie introduced me to the lady and asked could we stay at her hotel and I replied no because I have a booking at Captain Gregs but if we did not like that then I would check out her place. The woman and Rosie seemed a little disappointed but accepted my knock back and were soon deeply involved in their conversation again.

We waited on the dock for what must have been about another twenty minutes and during this time I had a good look at my surroundings. The Port area of Batangas was at that time a real shit hole. There was basically one large area where the buses parked and beyond that a wharf then behind that a sort of squatter town on stilts. There were literally hundreds of squalid shacks with thatched roofs all built on stilts. This was obviously a very poor area and life here was a hard grind against oppressive poverty. When I was growing up in Australia I had seen famines and people starving on the television news but it was another story altogether when I found myself confronted with it only 200 yards away from me. Throughout the entire squatter area life went on as normal with people performing their day to day routine there were filthy kids dressed in rags running around in the sea of plastic bags that littered the ground everywhere one looked, there were Filipino women washing clothes balanced precariously in their front doors and groups of Filipino men just standing around staring out into the distance with faces devoid of emotion.

Most noticeable all was the air of palpable tension even resentment that was pervasive throughout the entire area and I decided then and there this was not the sort of place I would want to spend to much time in. This was an area of grinding poverty and squalor where life was cheap and could easily be lost for the price of the next meal. I could see why the kids resorted to thievery and the men just had vacant stares. There was absolutely no incentive and no means to get money. Life was a day to day grind where one wondered if he would get a square meal or have to make do with fish heads and rice. With conditions like these I could fully understand how the people became as those I saw around me. In the years to come I would see many areas such as this including the infamous Smokey Mountain however none were to make as lasting an impression as the squatter area in Batangas. Maybe it was because it was my first time to actually be confronted with a slum area, maybe it was because I had come from a wealthy suburban middle class family and had no point of comparison or maybe it was because I was the only foreigner and was feeling vulnerable. I guess I will never truly know but I do know how the hopelessness of this place affected me and I couldn’t wait to get on that ferry and leave this place far behind me.

Just as I was beginning to wonder if the ferry would ever come there was a stirring amongst the crowd and I heard Rosie telling me honey boat come now. I looked up to see an old wooden ferry overflowing at the seams with people and lying low in the water slowly approaching the pier. Now at this stage in my Philippines adventures I was still a mere rookie and I was not familiar with the sinking of trans island ferries that happens in this country on a regular basis. The Philippines much like Indonesia is an island nation and yet despite this a large percentage of the population cannot swim. Combine this with ancient poorly constructed boats, massive overcrowding as money hungry ferry boat operators cram people on board far exceeding the boats weight capacity, boat captains whose maritime experience extend as far as the local fishing banca, a severe lack of properly functioning safety gear and the fact that tropical storms lash this country four months of every year and you have a recipe for disaster. As I have said at this stage in my adventure I was still very much a newbie and blissfully unaware of the Philippines maritime record and besides this ferry seemed a much better option than being caught in the Batangas pier squatter area.

As the ferry approached the gang of green shirt porters materialized from out of nowhere and next thing I knew our group was again surrounded by them but this time they didn’t seem to focus on us but rather on the ferry’s departing passengers who obviously represented a better opportunity of carrying the bags and as such a better opportunity to earn money. In the following months I was to do many trips to Manila from Peurto Galera and back again and through these trips I actually became friends with one of the green shirted porters but that is a story for another time.

Once the ferry had docked a large gang plank in the form of a level stairwell with ropes at the side enabling people to maintain their balance was thrown onto the wharf and passengers slowly traversed it into the waiting throng of porters and ragged slum urchins. I watched this procession with interest because this time it was not happening to me and I was detached which gave me a very good view of how the porters, pick pockets and snatchers plied their trade. Watching this and observing their methods was to come in very handy in the near future but at that point in time it just reconfirmed my decision that this was not a nice place to be and it should be avoided whenever possible.

As we boarded the ferry I realized just how ancient this boat was and it also became very obvious that it was going to be overcrowded so I grabbed Rosies hand and headed towards the boats bow where I could see some seats and I figured we would get a nice sea breeze for our journey to Mindoro. The trip to Peurto Galera was excellent as we crossed the channel the sun was blaring down but there was a nice cool breeze blowing so the temperature was perfect. Rosie was not particularly impressed with my choice of seating as she did not appreciate the sun turning her dark and so most of the time she was huddled beneath my jacket trying to avoid those dreaded darkening rays. Half way through the journey I spotted some dolphins gracefully swimming besides the boat but when I showed them to Rosie all she could say was can I eat dolphin? I have always been a big fan of dolphins and an admirer of their intelligence, their gracefulness and their seemingly friendly disposition towards human beings but to the Filipinos these animals were just another fish which meant they were seen as nothing more than a source of food.

After just over an hour on the boat we pulled into the famous port of Peurto Galera which to look at in those days reminded me of a tropical pirate haven. There were a series of single level buildings all of which had seen better days and could have done with a new coat of paint. Interspersed with the old buildings were smaller buildings with “nippa hut style roofs all of which served as stores selling the basic goods that the day to day living Filipinos consume at a ceaseless rate. Behind the buildings the landscape gives way to lush tropical jungle like vegetation which reminded me of the movie Apocalypse Now. The dominant feature of Peurto Galera has been and always will be the harbor. Peurto Galera developed as a safe harbor protecting ships from the ravages of tropical storms and its seafaring past is still very much evident. By far the busiest part of this town was the wharf and as the ferry pulled up I was greeted with the sight of over 100 Banca boats all docked at the wharf all vying for the ferry’s passengers.

As the ferry docked Rosie and I followed the rest of the passengers out onto the wharf where we were greeted by the Banca boat captains all vying for the passengers attention and extolling the virtues of their particular Banca boat which looked exactly the same as the rest of the Banca boats. At first the milling crowd was a little confusing and whilst Rosie and I just stood on the wharf wondering which banca to choose we were approached by one of the captains who seeing our obvious confusion announced “Sabang Beach sir I number 1 banca boat driver”. I looked at Rosie and asked hey hon can you ask him how much to Sabang and then ten minutes later we were on our own private banca heading towards Sabang beach a place that I had wondered earlier on in the day if I was ever going to make it to.

The ride to Sabang supposedly took about 30 minutes depending on how big the bancas motor was and the prevailing currents. Rosie and I settled down on the hard wooden bench just in front of the motor which was ably manned by Albert the banca captain who as it turned out had an excellent grasp of English and was full of stories about his adventures as a banca boat driver. We had been traveling for about 15 minutes with myself and Rosie admiring the scenery whilst listening to Albert regale us with stories when suddenly the motor started to sputter and then died. When she heard the motor die Rosie was instantly in a panic and I must admit to being a little worried myself especially when I asked Albert if he was going to put any more diesel in the engine and he replied “sorry sir walang fuel”.

Memoirs of a Philippine Mongerer

The trip down to Peurto Galera.

Rosie was not exactly impressed with my behavior but then as I pointed out to her I had no way of contacting her and for all I knew she may have changed her mind and decided against going to Peurto Galera with me. These were at best flimsy excuses but at that time they were the best I could come up with. Judging by the look on Rosies face and by the way the other girl slipped of my lap at the speed of lightning I knew I was in trouble but deciding offense is the best form of defense I looked Rosie straight in the eye and said hi beautiful so glad you could join us we have been only been waiting for an hour or more and I was beginning to think you weren’t coming. With that said I hugged her and gave her a big kiss which seemed to pacify her a little bit so I sat her down called over a waitress and ordered her a ladies drink, then called over the mamasan and paid Rosies bar fine for that night.

At the time my actions were purely instinctual but looking back on it I realize had I of had my present day experience, I would have done exactly the same thing. By kissing her in front of all her peers, buying her a ladies drink and paying her bar-fine I had given Rosie face. In the eyes of her compatriots she now appeared to have the upper hand which was very important since I had been the one to take her face away in the first place by playing with the other girl.

Dave and I sat with Rosie for a while and I then said well Rosie we have to get an early start if we are going to get down to Peurto Galera so let’s call it a night babe. Rosie looked at me earnestly and I could see her weighing up the pros and cons and then a big smile crossed her face and she said “sure why not honey let’s go holiday.”

That morning I awakened early at about 830 AM gently prodded a heavily sleeping Rosie who could only mumble something in Tagalog turn to the side and stay fast asleep. I decided to let Rosie snooze while I packed my bags. The packing took me about 45 minutes and after completing it I gently tried to awake Rosie but as usual with a sleeping Filipina this is more easily said than done. I don’t know how many readers have tried to wake up a sleeping Filipina and for those who are yet to experience this delight let me just say there is a real art to it. At this stage in my life I had not really had enough experience so I simply reverted to giving her a good shake which of course woke her up but put her in a bad mood for the rest of the day.

After hot showers it was a stumble downstairs to breakfast where an ever attentive David was waiting for us. Dave and I had a little chat and it was then that I realized I had missed the Sundowner Hotel bus and would now have to catch a local bus instead. When I expressed my concern to David he simply laughed and said look at it this way mate the local buses are just as good and half the price so just think of it as an adventure and part of your learning experience.” David and myself had a chat where he basically gave me the lay of the land explaining to me that I had to catch a taxi to some place named Areneta where the buses are stationed which take you down to Batangas and then from Batangas Port I should catch the SuperCat or the local ferry across to Peurto Galera. I looked at David as if he had been talking to me in a foreign language then asked him to repeat the instructions again but this time to Rosie as she might be able to make heads or tails of his instructions where I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. David went through it one more time with Rosie and then asked if she understood to which she nodded her head and said “oo”. Watching Rosie did not exactly fill me with confidence so I politely asked David to write down the place names just so I had a backup should we happen to somehow get lost.

After receiving the directions for Peuto Galera I left my suitcase with David for storage then carrying my rucksack and one small bag of Rosies we made our way out onto the street to hail a taxi. As always the Mayfair guard was there and next thing I knew I was being bundled into the back of a taxi together with Rosie and our luggage. A brief discussion ensued where Rosie kindly but firmly requested the driver to turn on his meter and then gave him directions as to where we were going.

20 minutes later we arrived at the unofficial bus terminal which was really just a large parking lot local bus terminal. Just as we stopped the driver quickly flicked a switch on his meter and it went back to 30 piso which was the starting amount before undertaking a journey. All of a sudden there was a torrent of angry Tagalog from Rosie directed at the smartass driver and then I was instructed to give the “bastos” driver 60 piso. Of course I did not have the small notes on me so I handed over a 100 piso note only to be told sorry sir “walang change”. This response caused another angry tirade from Rosie which I cut short by saying ‘it’s ok babe let the dickhead play his little games, its not worth the hassle and we have to get down to Peurto Galera.” This was not going to be the last bad experience I was to have with a Filipino taxi driver but it did teach me a lesson and that is always ask for them to put on the meter and if they don’t try to arrange a price before undertaking the journey.

After alighting from the taxi Rosie and I strolled across the road to a line of buses where we fell in line behind a herd of Filipinos all pushing and shoving to get on the bus. At first I just stood in line politely waiting my turn to get on board the bus but then I realized if I did this I would probably never get to board the bus until sometime the next day. I looked at Rosie who seemed to read my mind and together we pushed and shoved our way onto the bus. Like so many aspects of Philippine society the public transport works on a “me first” basis were one is required to assert oneself otherwise you will get absolutely nowhere.

Eventually we made it onto the bus where I was just about to breathe a sigh of relief until I saw yet another crowd of people all pushing and shoving to get a seat. Together we navigated the narrow aisle negotiating our way through a crowd of passengers and vendors until we reached the very back of the bus where we found two vacant seats. Within minutes I found myself crammed into my seat rubbing shoulders with some swarthy looking Filipino guy and feeling like a sardine jammed inside a can. As I sat there I surveyed my situation and began to feel distinctly uncomfortable. Here I was in a strange country surrounded by Filipinos all talking in some foreign language that I had no comprehension of whilst at the same time sneaking furtive looks at me the sole white man who had absolutely no business being there. This whole experience was a little disconcerting and I was extremely grateful that I had bought Rosie along with me who was the only familiar face in this crowd of strangers.

After about half an hour of sitting there being crammed into the confined space with a radio blasting out a seemingly never ending blare of distorted seventies love ballads and having to fight hordes of vendors who seemed absolutely fascinated with this strange white man invading their territory and even more convinced that he should sample of their Filipino delicacies. One particular vendor who was selling quail eggs finally figured out that he was more likely to make a sale if he concentrated on Rosie and after 3 minutes of haggling Rosie finally gave in and asked me for five piso so she could buy the eggs.

After a while the bus started moving and as I felt the busses wheels roll beneath me I realized I was starting another part of my Philippine adventure. Traveling through Manila was and still is a nightmare because of the continual traffic but when you are in a bus and raised above the traffic it doesn’t seem so bad. To get through Manila was a two hour journey and we traveled at a snails pace I found myself clutching onto my rucksack between my feet and at the same time gently chatting with Rosie who as it turned out had been to Peurto Galera before with another customer but was shy to tell me previously.

Finally we made it to what seemed to be the outskirts of Manila and suddenly the drab grey buildings and squalid wooden shacks gave way to a modern highway dotted with cane and corn fields along with the occasional small town the inhabitants of which all seemed to live right besides the road. David had informed me the journey was about 3 to 4 hours long depending on traffic but once out of Manila there was only a small amount of traffic and what held us up was the continual stopping allowing people to get on and off the bus.

Along the entire length of the bus in the walking aisle they had placed a number of small plastic chairs big enough for about one ass cheek of the average western male. These were all occupied by Filipinos who I got the impression regarded themselves lucky because they had a seat albeit a tiny one which was much better than standing up.

I have never been one for sleeping whilst traveling but Rosie being Filipino seemed to have that enviable ability to get in a seat and within half an hour was soundly asleep. One minute I was chatting with her and the next thing I knew she was fast asleep with her head resting on my shoulder. Many times I have wished for the ability to sleep while traveling but I just can’t seem to do it and this time I was particularly grateful for staying awake.

We had been traveling for about 2 hours when I felt the swarthy looking Filipino next to me rub against my shoulder. Thinking nothing of it because of the crowded conditions I shifted as much as I could towards Rosie but some sixth sense started ringing alarm bells in my head and I looked down at my rucksack between my feet and sure enough the Filipino guy next to me had the clips undone and was in the process of riffling through my bag. At first glance it didn’t register what this prick was doing but after seconds it dawned on me and my instantaneous reaction was to grab the guys arm and pull him forward banging his head on the seat in front of him. The seats are of course padded so this didn’t hurt him much and as he came upright again I drew back my finger and simply pocked him in his eye. A solid poke in the eye will slow just about anybody down no matter how big or small and this was certainly the case here. The would be thief reeled backwards covering his teary eye with his hand whilst letting out a cry of dismay and pain. By this time Rosie had woken up and instantly grasping the situation had started on her verbal tirade against this guy. I guess Rosie’s stream of invective and the poke in the eye must have been more than enough for this guy and with a bus full of Filipinos watching him warily he slowly stood up and made his way towards the front of the bus negotiating the small plastic chairs whilst dabbing at his still watery eye.

Eventually he made it to the front of the bus talked with the driver and then within seconds the bus stopped and he was let off. As the bus rolled away I looked out the window only to see my would be robber surrounded by three other guys all of whom looked up at me simultaneously and in response I smiled and wagged my finger in the universal sign of you have been naughty. The look on the Filipinos faces was one of pure hatred as if I had done something wrong in defending my personal property then again those looks could have been directed at Rosie who was right behind me sticking her fingers in the air at the group of guys making her thoughts crystal clear.

Rosie later informed me these guys work as a team and probably carry butterfly knives so I should be careful. When she told me this I realized my actions had been a bit risky but then again what was I supposed to do let the guy take what he wants from me just because of the fear he may have a knife. This was never going to happen and I realized then and there even forearmed with the knowledge he had a knife I still would have done exactly the same thing except I would have followed the poke in the eye with a short sharp punch to the ribs.

Rosie and I discussed what had happened and she warned me to be careful when in Batangas because there are squatter kids all over the wharf area who specialize in snatch and grab practices and many of them will utilize a sharp knife to pry your baggage away from you. After about half an hours more travel we entered the port area of Batangas which is the connection point for the trip across to Mindoro island where Peurto Galera is situated. Slowly but surely the Filipinos filed of the bus only to be greeted by a sea of aggressive porters all shouting at the top of their voices trying to get their attention and offering to carry the bags. Amongst the porters I could see the small street kids who must have been somewhere between 8 and 10 years old all dressed in squalid rags and all with that hungry look in their eyes. As I surveyed this scene I thought to myself what the heck have I gotten myself into. I instructed Rosie to lead me to where the ferry was waiting and steeled myself to enter the fray of hungry Filipinos who saw me and my belongings as an instant meal ticket.

Memoirs of a Philippine Mongerer

Plans for Peurto Galera.

Once Rosie had finished her shower and made herself up to look a million dollars we proceeded downstairs for brunch. Rosie was one of these women who as the Aussies like to say “scrubs up well” and she could do this with just minimal makeup and minimal time. Rosie had nice child bearing hips, just the right length legs, big tits which were always displayed prominently due to her use of push up bras, soft light brown skin, Chinese eyes and shoulder length black hair which she would swish from side to side along with her backside whenever she walked. The total package was an intoxicating mix of blossoming young womanhood and provocative sexuality, which made her for me, virtually irresistible.

Rosie was by no means a class act and she wasn’t exactly a soft malleable female but there was an essential forthrightness and straightforwardness about her that attracted people. For a Filipina working the bar she was comparatively secure in her sexuality and didn’t exhibit the trappings of guilt that plagues so many bar girls in this country. Rosie would often call a spade a spade but only when pushed, most of the time she would just sit and listen like a dutiful, female companion. To her credit she knew that to control her man she must let him appear, in public at least, to be the controlling force and would only exert her will in private or behind the scenes. Rosie had that enviable ability of controlling her man utilizing her subtle feminine wiles and most of the time she would get what she wanted with the minimum of fuss.

Rosie’s time in the bars had left its mark. On the one hand she had seen a side of life that had hardened her and yet on the other hand she was a gentle young woman barely out of her teens, that had an entire life to look forward to. The trappings of the bar are for most Filipinas inevitable and this was certainly the case for Rosie who was a little rough around the edges and was not exactly the type of girl you take home to meet mom. What attracted me to Rosie, apart from the great sex, was the fact that she exhibited the classic duality of the Filipina bar girl. On one level she was a little whore who dressed like a cheap slut and was verging on what we now call trailer park trash. On the other hand she was an exotic looking girl who would artfully use her soft feminine traits to manipulate a situation and get her way. Dressed in the appropriate clothing she was right at home walking the streets of M.H.Del Pilar smiling and flirting with male customers, hurling insults at her fellow bar girls, or purchasing shabu from a local street supplier and yet this same girl if she put her mind to it could easily blend into the so called social scene of Manila and entertain people with her little quips and seemingly penetrating comments. This girl was a walking contradiction and the more time I spent with her the more attracted I became.

At brunch David came and joined us and as we sat there I thought to myself this would be the perfect time to introduce the idea of going down to Peurto Galera. We had just finished our club sandwiches and Rosie was half way through her Bangus (fish) with rice when I piped up to David, hey mate I have read about this Peurto Galera place and I keep on hearing people talking about it, what’s it like there mate, have you ever been there, is it cheaper than Manila and do you reckon I should go down there for a while. While David was contemplating his answers I looked at Rosie to see if she had registered my desire to leave Manila but she managed to keep her poker face and just carried on eating.

After a couple of sips of his coffee David replied “you don’t like to ask just one question do you kid. Listen mate do I reckon Peurto Galera is a better option for you well I have to say yes. It will be cheaper to survive down there, the life style is more laid back, it’s a healthier environment, there’s a good infrastructure there and best of all you get to experience some more of the Philippines.” Then he popped the leading question, tell me mate were you planning on going down yourself or taking Rosie? To answer him I looked over at Rosie and said hey Rosie would you like to come down to Peurto Galera with me and to my surprise Rosie looked up at me and with a beaming smile said simpri (of course in Tagalog) and then continued eating her Bangus and rice.

Ok that was step one completed and now came the hard part. “So tell me mate” I asked David, “what should I do about the bar I mean I don’t want to get Rosie in trouble or do anything to hurt the bar or give myself a bad name but I don’t really know how long we will be down there and I can’t really afford to pay the steady bar fine or anything like that so I was just wondering how to go about things.” David looked at me and said Marty this is a common problem but the bottom line is Rosie can simply tell her mamasan she is going down to the province for a while. I got to tell you most of these girls if they like the guy they are with will jump at the chance to leave the bar and go on holiday to somewhere like Peurto Galera. For them it is a break, they get a sponsored holiday and there is always the chance a relationship may develop which will help them get out of the Philippines and earn some decent money working overseas. Also mate you have to realize Rosie is a good looking girl and could probably get a job in any of the bars along Del Pilar so the bar is not exactly in a position to argue besides there are boat loads of girls with mud between their toes arriving everyday so one leaving the fold will hardly make a big difference.”

David then went onto say that even though there was an established social scene down in PG evolving around 3 bars and several restaurants it was probably better for me to take a girl with me. He also pointed out that this would be a great chance for me to relax just like Boracay but hopefully with a different ending. I looked at Rosie and said so babe if you want you can go see your mamasan tonight and tell her you are going to the province for some time. Rosie glanced up from food and replied “Martin my mama she know me with you, my mama she not stupid. I tell her I go province with you because you meet my family then no problem.” I looked at David to see his reaction but he just shrugged his shoulders and said “sounds fair dinkum to me mate why not.”

That day was spent mainly doing research on Peurto Galera. By asking around I found out there were several ways of getting there which included a bus from various hotels or the local bus which left from somewhere outside of Ermita. Now I wasn’t exactly the seasoned Philippine veteran so I decided to use the tourist bus leaving from the Sundowner hotel even though it departed at the disgustingly early hour of 9AM. Using the Mayfairs travel office and bugging the shit out of David with my insistent questions I finally managed to organize some rooms at Captain Greg’s which was one of the more established resorts right on Sabang beach. David informed me this was resort which catered mainly for divers but for the first timers it was a great place to stay because it was well established, the rooms were decent, the owners were Australian and knew the lay of the land plus they were mates of his who would gladly give a discount on my accommodation costs.

To arrange the trip took about three hours and the whole time Rosie just sat in my room ordering room service and watching Tagalog television. Later in the afternoon I gave Rosie some money and said “listen babe you go do what you got to do. Go have a talk with your mamasan then go to your place pack your bags and I will catch up with you later on tonight.” Rosie took the money and said ‘thank you honey” then she gave me a big kiss and headed out the door.

That night I shouted David to dinner at the Swiss hut and we talked about Peurto Galera extensively. By the time dinner was finished I had a much better idea what to expect and was actually feeling a little excited to be heading out of Manila on my latest adventure. After dinner I announced to David that I should go pick up Rosie and he replied “don’t worry about Rosie mate she’ll be right, let’s do a little bar hop first. The nights still young and there’s a shit of load of girls you and I need to meet.” With that said I paid the bill and we proceeded to hit some of the bars around the Swiss Hut area.

We must have spent about 3 hours bar hopping with David and myself downing copious amounts of alcohol and playing with girls but in the back of my mind was a nagging feeling about Rosie and eventually I said “listen Dave it’s been great fun mate but I really have to go see Rosie and make sure everything’s ok for tomorrow.” Upon hearing this David replied oh shit yeah I forgot all about that come on let’s finish our drinks here and then we can head to Bee club.” With that said we both skulled our drinks paid the bill and headed towards Bee Club.

When we hit Bee Club it was surprisingly busy with a number of patrons sitting at the bar and others occupying the sofas where I had first met Rosie. We looked around and managed to find a seat in the corner and then the waitress came up to take our orders. We ordered the drinks and I looked around for Rosie. I Must have had a worried expression on my face because one of the waitresses came up to me and asked “why you look so serious” to which I laughed and half heartedly replied “no I am not serious I am just looking for a friend of mine who works here.” “What’s his name” asked the waitress to which I replied “her name is Rosie and she was supposed to meet me here but I don’t see her anywhere”. The waitress looked at me with a kind of knowing and somewhat sorrowful expression and replied “for a while I get mummy.”

After about ten more minutes waiting the mamasan appeared and said “kumasta Martin where is my girl Rosie’. Taken aback I replied wait a minute mummy I sent Rosie back this afternoon, are you telling me you haven’t seen her at all today”? Upon hearing my words the mamasan looked me up and down as if measuring me up or trying to see if I was lying and then deciding that I was telling the truth she replied “I no see Rosie all day I think she is with you.” Now I was a little confused and at a total loss at what to do so I simply glanced in David’s direction and with my best imploring look asked “hey mate can I have a little help here please.” David responded straight away and after a brief chat with the mamasan he told me Rosie hadn’t shown all day and the mamasan thought she was with you and that you had come in tonight to pay her bar fine again. Now I was totally lost and I could see all my best laid plans going up in smoke in front of my eyes.

“What the fuck am I going to do” I asked David but he just smiled and said “what did I tell you mate these girls have their own focus and never get hung up on one”. This was not exactly helpful advice for me at the current point in time and I was feeling slightly devastated. David obviously saw this and said mate I suggest we wait here for lets say another half hour then if she is a no show we can look for somebody else to accompany you down to Peurto Galera in fact I think I see the perfect girl for you right now. With that said David said something to the mamasan and next thing I knew I had a scantily clad Filipina wiggling her barely covered bottom against my crotch and the ever hovering waitress asking “would you like to buy lady drink sir”.

David and waited for what must have been about one hour and during that time thoughts of Rosie and my apparent rejection began to fade especially since this young nymph kept on playing with my dick and shoving her pert brown tits in my face. As the night progressed I had just about forgotten about Rosie and as I yet again inserted one Hershey chocolate kiss nipple into my mouth I heard an angry cry and the words “puntang ina mo” being shouted at me. I rapidly withdrew my lips from the chocolate nipples to look up and sure enough there was a very angry Rosie with glass in hand ready to launch at my head.

Memoirs of a Philippine Mongerer

A whole lotta Rosie.

As soon as I had finished my short time and walked out of the shower into an empty room with only the wafting aroma of Rosie’s perfume to greet me I should have written her off to experience but being one of those people who thrives on a challenge I just couldn’t let her go and I was determined to get to the bottom of her mysterious behavior.

I spent the day lounging around the Mayfair writing letters to family members who somehow were beginning to seem like a thing of the distant past then by the time it was 6pm I found myself heading down M.H.Del Pillar and entering Bee club in search of the elusive Rosie. As soon as I entered I saw Rosie sitting over by the bar and when she saw me she leveled me with a smile that made anger disappear and next thing I knew I was sitting at the bar with her buying her a ladies drink.

Rosie and I spent about 2 hours just chatting with me buying her drinks and before I knew it I was proposing she go bar fine with me. Rosie readily accepted my proposition and before long we were going back in my hotel room with Rosie sucking on my dick like a vacuum cleaner like there was no tomorrow. We must have gone at it about five times that night and when I woke the following afternoon I was pleasantly surprised to find Rosie sleeping soundly besides me with one leg draped over my torso and one hand still firmly grabbing my dick.

So this was the beginning of my relationship with Rosie. Now I admit there have certainly been more auspicious beginnings but then again this is the Philippines and besides she was just so damned good in bed I really couldn’t see myself finding anyone better than her. I think I bar fined Rosie for seven days straight and it was on the seventh day that David approached me asking for a quiet word in my ear.

David sat me down, looked me straight in the eyes and said “listen mate it’s really none of my business but you seem fairly keen on this Rosie girl. Now I am not saying this is a bad thing but there are a couple of things I want you to keep in your mind. Remember where you are mate and remember what she does for a living. You are not the first and only guy in her life and you probably won’t be the last if you get my drift.” Being a laconic Aussie David was always a master of the understatement so I looked at him and said “what exactly are you trying to tell me Dave” and he responded with “mate she is a hooker, she works in the bar and survives by having sex with men, always remember that if you find yourself falling for her. I am not saying stop the relationship but just realize the grounds of the relationship that way you will save yourself a lot of money and heart ache further on up the road.”David stressed to me “you can be friends with the bar girls and you can even have that special friendship but never forget how she earned her money before and never apply the same values to a Filipina bar girl that you would to a so called normal relationship in the real world.” With tha said he looked me in the eye once again and said “Martin always be a butterfly” and with that rose and walked through to his office at the back of the hotel.

After he left I sat and contemplated David’s words for a good half hour mulling them over in my head whilst sipping on a cup of hot tea. I knew this was my first trip and he was speaking from a base of experience that I didn’t have, I also realized he was telling me this because he obviously saw something and was concerned about my well being but hey I was a grown man and I wasn’t about to let a little undereducated Filipina bar girl make a fool out of me.

After carefully weighing David’s words I decided that I still wanted to be with Rosie but I would distance myself a little bit and try to stop any strong feelings from developing. Looking back on it I realize David was exactly right and it was almost as if he had a crystal ball in which he could see the future. In the years to come I would find myself having exactly the same conversation with friends of mine as I saw them getting involved with Filipina bar girls and I now realize I am forever in David’s debt as once again his advice was spot on the money.

In modern day parlance they have a saying “it is what it is” and this saying neatly sums up what David was trying to tell me. One of the dangerous things about Filipinas is that they have a way of getting under your skin and making you develop real feelings for them which in turn means you forget the cornerstones of the relationship and start to view it as something it is not rather than what it really is. It is so easy to develop what you think are intense feelings for a girl and have what seems like a genuine relationship however, how the girl views the relationship is most often completely different. I am not saying all Filipina bar girls are evil scheming manipulative whores but I am saying their idea of the depth of the relationship may be very different from yours yet you may never know it until its to late. The bar girls are nothing if not practical and underneath the veneer of emotion there will always be the cold hard agenda of economic survival for themselves and their family.

After mulling over David’s words I made a decision that I would try to control my feelings for Rosie, I would take a step backwards and try to look at our friendship through practical eyes rather than emotive ones. With this decided I finished my third cup of tea and headed back to my room where Rosie who had over the past week developed the habit of sleeping in late, lay waiting for me.

In the room I woke Rosie by gently caressing those firm breasts with the rose bud nipples and as she slowly came round I felt the all to familiar urging in my loins and next thing I knew we were engaging in yet another tumultuous round of sexual gratification.

After sex while Rosie was in the shower I decided to take stock of my situation. Basically I did not have unlimited funds and staying at the Mayfair whilst bar fining and tipping Rosie every night was beginning to eat into my spending money. I had only been in the country 3 short months and already I was addicted to the lifestyle and the thought of actually moving onto England to find a real job as in my original travel plan just appalled me. At this stage I wasn’t exactly struggling but if I wanted to stay here for a longer period of time it was clearly obvious that I would have to slow the spending a little bit.

In the Lonely Planet Guide Book to the Philippines I had read about this place called Peurto Galera and whilst carousing the bars I had overheard people talking about it so this seemed like a suitable destination. My only problem was how to approach Rosie with this. On the one hand I was kind of tempted to pay a steady bar fine so at least this way I would have some companionship and Rosie would have a healthy commission which would hopefully stop her from asking me for money all the time plus I wouldn’t have to tip her after sex. On the other hand the steady bar fine was a large outpouring of cash and there were no guarantees Rosie would even stay with me. I weighed up the pros and cons of each scenario and in the end came to the conclusion my best course of action was to try and convince Rosie to come with me for a holiday and just have some fun. I would sell it to her as a holiday and a change of scenery. Once again previous conversations with David were echoing in my mind and now my course of action was defined.

Now I look back on this I realize how naïve I was but at the time my logic made perfect sense. If I was confronted with this situation again and knowing what I now know I would probably try for the steady bar fine but at a discounted rate or even better at bar share rate only. The thing is no matter how much money the girl gets from a steady she will invariably send this money back to her parents or spend it thus relying on you her customer to support her once again. The steady bar fine has numerous advantages which I will not go into here since it is hardly an appropriate forum and given what happened in the ending stages of my relationship with Rosie I would have been better off paying it but that’s a story for another day.